So Lovely Dead

You are dying a slow death within me and I can feel it slowly and slowly dripping off my sleeve where my heart used to be. I am no longer a fool giggling right from my stomach over our shenanigans of lips, tongues, and raw flesh. I want to tell you for the very last time before I lose touch that I made you quite a handsome coffin just like your gorgeous mouth. The day you lost your boyish innocence was the day when all your tattooed kisses vanished in thin air. I can feel the vapors slowly and slowly begging for the sky to embrace them. I envy the sky a lot, it never came for me. 

You wanted me to show the world how dearly, delicately, deadly, I loved you. I can feel it, you slowly and slowly taking a dervish swirl over my lethality. I want to tell you before I shed your smell off my body that I used to lose touch with you to the point where my consciousness would be lost in its entirety. And, you would also be so proud to know that your power dynamics are still intact, though subtly. You can rejoice in it if you want, make a lighthouse if you please. It is not in my hands anymore. Your hands had my life in a cage and I am setting it free. 

Your city would look lovely without you. I went back to all the cafes where we were shooed away for our lack of decency. Nobody dared lift a finger this time. I am smiling as I write this because you used to say I suck the blood out of you. I think they know it too now. 

I guess I look just fine. I had your favorite lipstick, all dolled up in silks. Everything is too bright today exactly like your daydreams. Also, I guess I won't be taking any man home today to make sure my cats are not displeased. I matter the most today, in this new city, thousands of miles away from you. I close my eyes as I mumble my incantations, I hope I haven't killed you long enough to have you look so lovely dead.